stillplaying | 13th Game [video]

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13th Game [video]

[There's a bashful look on her face when she opens the journal. It's been a whole day now, a whole day since she returned from her kidnapping. Since she had discovered Prim had arrived in her absence, since she had gotten to once again spend the whole day and night in the company of her sister. It had been amazing. A dream that she had never thought possible. Prim was dead and yet... yet, for whatever reason, she had been brought here.

Perhaps she should have alerted those outside of her household that she had returned. But all she had wanted for that one day was to spend it alongside Prim. To tell her everything that had happened in the months - year - following her death. To tell her about Commander Paylor and the new government of Panem. To tell her of all those she had met here, of Peeta and Richard, Teddy and Sokka and Zevran and Rapunzel. It had been the wee hours of the night by the time she had gone to bed.

But sometime in the mid-morning, she remembers promises she had made. To the man who had helped her in learning how to get her voice back. To the boy who was now suffering from a death penalty of his own. She had promised them both a song. And it seems now like such a small price to pay to gaining not one, but two, important parts of her life back.

She ducks her head for a second, fingers playing with the buttons and beads on the handmade necklace Sokka made her. And then she clears her throat and begins to sing with a voice that, as Peeta once claimed, would silence the birds:]

As I look at the valleys down below
They are green just as far as I can see
As my memories return, oh how my heart did yearn
For you and the days that used to be
High on a mountain top, standing all alone
Wondering where the years of my life have flown
High on a mountaintop, wind blowing free
Thinking about the days that used to be

Well, I wonder if you ever think of me
Or has time erased your memory
As I listen to the breeze whisper gently through the trees
I wonder if you ever think of me

High on a mountain top, standing all alone
Wondering where the years of my life have flown
High on a mountaintop, wind blowing free
Thinking about the days that used to be
High on a mountain top, standing all alone
Wondering where the years of my life have flown
High on a mountaintop, wind blowing free
Thinking about the days that used to be

High on a mountain top
Thinking about the days that used to be
And I wonder if you ever think of me

[When she's done singing, she smiles sheepishly and shrugs.] I promised a song to a few people. I hope you enjoyed it.

[She opens her mouth a second later to say something more. And then she pauses and, for once, actually takes the time to construct a filter. To make certain that Prim cannot see what follows. Because even though Katniss' own birthday is only a few days away, she's not thinking of that day very much. It pales in comparison to a much more important day approaching at the end of the month.]

Does anyone have much experience throwing birthday parties? My sister - Prim - she's here now. And her birthday's in a few weeks. We could never afford a proper celebration growing up. I'd like to give her that. Give her everything that she couldn't have back home. [She frowns for a moment, brow wrinkling in thought.] I also need to build an addition to my house. Where'd I go about getting the material for that?

[ooc: for those interested in what the song might sound like. though this isn't exactly how i picture katniss' voice. nor does she have musical accompaniment in this post.]

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[The silence stretches, and Pepper is a little unsure if Katniss is still there or if she’s gotten disconnected somehow, at least at first. She thinks she can hear something from the woman’s end of the journals, however, though the noise is faint, and not anything she can decipher.] Katniss?

[But then the person in question speaks up again, and Pepper relaxes.] You know, if you were interested in learning more, the item shop gets music in sometimes.

[She heard her name and thinks, for a moment, to apologize. She had forgot that the journal was no longer on video. But since the women doesn't question further, Katniss opts not to. She can always explain later. Or keep the small notepad closer by.

Because this sort of news was just as interesting as everything else Pepper has thus far said.]

What kind of music?

Any kind, really. I haven’t taken a good look in a while, but last time I did, there was a pretty good variety. [Which had been months earlier, when she’d been preparing for a mission for the Malnosso. Hopefully the span of time had only increased the selection.] I also know a couple of music enthusiasts: Jack Holden and Eugene Woods. They may be able to help you too.

[The names sounded familiar. For a moment, she thought of a crippled man who had compensated for his injury and had done rather well with learning how to shoot. They also made her think of Zevran's roommates. Why hadn't she made that connection before? It was the same Eugene, wasn't it?]

Do you know if they have sheet music?

[Because that could make a nice gift. Not so much for Prim, but for Teddy. A thank you for the guitar lessons she had come to treasure.]

They might. At the very least, I’m pretty sure they could direct you to someone who would. [There had been such a positive response to the idea of a radio show, Pepper’s pretty sure they can help her out.

She hesitates for a moment longer, then lets out a quiet sigh. There’s something else Pepper needs to address with Katniss, and now seems like a good time.] Listen. About what happened during the last experiment. I’m sorry for how I was acting.

[The change in discussion catches her off guard. Katniss would have been perfectly content with not mentioning it at all. What happened during that hijacking hadn't been any of their faults. It had been the Malnosso, the Gamemakers, playing their games again.

Pepper had been as much responsible for her words and actions as Katniss had been.

Those thoughts are readily expressed on her face when she scowls in response to Pepper's apologies.]

Don't. [She shakes her head quickly.] Don't apologize.

[Pepper knows that, of course. The way she'd treated people during the last Shift isn't something she'd ever do if Pepper had been herself. But that's part of why she wants to say she's sorry anyway. Her actions had been distasteful to say the absolute least.

But Katniss seems to understand, and she's adamant about now wanting to hear it. So Pepper nods carefully.]

Okay. I just wanted to be sure that things are okay between us. I think it's important to not let bad feelings that might arise during an experiment or after it fester.

[She nodded quick and in agreement. It was important, very important. Much like that tentative treaty that she and Clove still worked to uphold. The deaths caused in the arena had been the result of a game, the way the Gamemakers manipulated them until one Victor (or two) remained standing. Had circumstances been different, had Clove and Katniss met outside of the Hunger Games, how would things between them gone?

She accepted the experiments here in much the same sense.]

It wasn't you. And it wasn't me. That's enough for me.

I'm glad you see it that way. [Very much so, as Katniss seems to be handling this really well. Pepper relaxes in turn, and even manages to smile a bit by the time the camera takes her picture again.]

It seems like you're doing a lot better in general.

[She was, wasn't she? Though aware of it, she wasn't so much aware how visible it was to others. Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing though. She had spent so much of her time here wary or angry or depressed. So much of the past few years of her life. It was kind of nice to feel almost at ease.

She could sing. She had her sister. She lived in a house full of people she could provide for. It felt a lot less like going through the motions and a lot more like actually living life. And she had a boy - a friend, but a boy nonetheless - who desired her, who enjoyed spending time with her in a way that had nothing to do with hunting.]

I am. [For the first time since before the 74th Hunger Games, she feels confident in saying that.] I'm doing a lot better. And I didn't even have to have memories removed.

[Now that really is wonderful to hear. Everything seems to be turning around for Katniss, and Pepper couldn’t be happier for the girl.] That’s great! I really think you made the right choice, in that case. And I’m very happy things have turned out for you.

[Sometimes she wondered still if she made the right choice. If any of her choices lately had been the right ones. The smart ones. But since Prim's arrival, she stopped questioning so often. She tried, really tried, to live in the moment. For her sister's sake.

She smiled back at the woman, a warm and grateful sort of look on her face.]

Thank you.

[Pepper might wonder that too, if she knew some of Katniss’s choices. But even then, it’d be hard to say given that the girl who had been so desperate and broken before now seems almost joyful.]

I think we got off topic a bit. Was there anything else you wanted help with in regards to Prim’s party?

[They had, hadn't they? And it hadn't really been so bad, either. Even if she appreciated the return to the topic of Prim's birthday a little more. Less sentiment involved. Less having to deal with the repercussions of the Malnosso's damned games.]

Is there anything else you'd recommend? [She hesitated for a moment before adding in.] I've never planned a party before.

I thought that might be the case. [Somehow Katniss doesn’t at all strike her as the type who would be playing host, which makes the gesture all that much sweeter.] Well, we talked about keeping her likes in mind. Also try to get an idea of how many people are coming in advance, to make sure you have enough for everyone. Leftovers can be dealt with, but running out of food or drinks can cause problems. Likewise, that way you can make sure you have a big enough space for everyone, especially if you’re going to have people gathered around while she opens presents or blows out birthday candles.

I was going to have the party here, at the house. [And if someone accidentally (or purposely) spilled food or drink on some of Effie's more ostentatious furniture, all the better. She paused for a moment, thinking it over.] There's the area outside of the house. As well as the living spaces inside.

[But as far as people to invite? She hadn't thought much about that. Prim had just arrived here. While she normally made friends faster than Katniss, a few weeks really wasn't all that much time.]

I was thinking of inviting everyone I knew. Or who might have talked to her since her arrival.

Then you should be fine. [A house would be less obtrusive than the kitchen in one of the apartment buildings, unless it's a case where she could invite everyone on the floor.] And either might work. You can also get an idea of who to invite from Prim herself. You don't have to outright ask her, especially if you want this to be a surprise, but if you listen during normal conversation, then you'll hear her talk about people she's met.

[And there's the message Prim sent out when she arrived, although the girl may be trying to surprise Katniss as well, so she doesn't point it out yet.]

[It was a good point. All she really had to do was sit there and let her sister talk. Prim was always open about her life. She could remember more than one afternoon where she'd sit, quietly working on dinner, while Prim told her every little detail of her day at school.

The memories made her smile.] That won't be hard to do.

Good. I think that should cover the most important parts. [At least in a general sense; actual specifics such as which foods or decorations would be more up to Katniss to decide.] But if you need any more help, I’d be happy to give it.

[It was a start. And with both Rapunzel and Aang's replies, she suddenly felt a little more confident that she could pull this off. That it would be an amazing party. One that Prim would never forget.]

I'll do that. Thank you, Pepper.

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13th Game [video]

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