stillplaying | 17th Game [video]

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video

17th Game [video]

[It had almost come as a relief when the droids had appeared on her doorstep the day after the shift ended. She hadn't wanted to see Prim. Prim, that darling sister that meant the world to her. The girl that she would have died for. Nearly had on multiple times. Prim, who she had forgotten all about during the shift. It hadn't ever been that bad when Peeta had been here. The Malnosso had been kind in that regard, always let them know each other in some form. Would it have been so much to ask to keep Prim her sister regardless?

Apparently.

It would be easy to say she deserved that. Deserved to experience love again - real love like she had had with Peeta - only to discover that it had been as imaginary as her last relationship. Jim didn't love her. She didn't love him. The whole idea of an engagement had been a lie. Everything had been fake. Nothing real. Maybe, maybe under other circumstances, it would have been easier to accept. If matters hadn't ended with Sokka the way they had, if those wounds hadn't still been so raw, maybe...

There had been no argument when the droids appeared. Going meant avoiding those encounters. Meant not admitting she had forgotten her sister or an awkward discussion with Jim. It meant maybe trying to find Effie, make certain that she was alright. It was the closest thing short to going on a mission that she could get to leaving Luceti.

Prim would be alright. She'd have Richard and Teddy. People who hadn't forgotten her the way Katniss had.

But time with the Malnosso came to an end all too soon. And as she stared at the familiar walls of the painted room, the trees of her beloved forests outside of District 12, she felt almost tempted to run away. Go on one of those missions. Not have to see anyone here. Pick up the pieces of the mess she had made her life before the last shift. Or the mess that had come as a result.

She had never been good at running away though. Not even when they should have before the Quarter Quell, before Panem went insane. Damn it. Damn, damn, damn.

Sighing, Katniss picked up the journal and turned on the device. She brushed a stray strand from the braid out of her face and quirked her lips a little to the right. It would be better this way, announcing her return through the journal rather than being brave enough to seek them out.]

For anyone who might care, I'm back.

[Dare she even ask what more she might have missed?]

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She knew when to let go. And as soon as Foo Foo jumped up for the squirrel, she let go of the tail and took a quick step back. She didn't need to knocked down by the saber-toothed moose lion. That would be embarrassing. And entirely defeat the purpose of showing Sokka up.

As soon as she was certain that Foo Foo had the squirrel, she turned around to face Sokka. Eyes narrowed as she scowled at him. "I don't taunt."

Unlike, her words implied, some people standing here.

He sighed. "I didn't mean it like that."

This was pointless. Quibbling over Foo Foo, like he was the center of it all. He was torn between just finding a reason to leave and the need to find some way to patch things up. But he doubted there would be anything he could say that would have that effect.

She tilted her head, doing her best not to shrink into herself. This conversation was growing more and more uncomfortable by the second. She was tempted to flee. To not say another word. Disappear into the woods and never, ever talk to him again.

It really would be the easiest choice in the matter. Instead, she stayed rooted to the ground. Watching him, waiting.

Wanting something and not at all certain what that something was.

Waiting. Watching. Saying nothing. It was stupid. She hated him, so it didn't matter what he said. Either it would accomplish something or she'd keep hating him.

So he'd just say it.

"I wish it hadn't ended up like this."

He wasn't alone with that sediment. She gave a short, brusque nod. She never should have given in to his flirtations. She never, ever should have thought that necklace to be anything more than that of a friend. Even if, at the time, it hadn't been meant to be the git o a friend. It had been meant to buy her affections.

It had worked. She had been that stupid.

"Me too."

"We made good hunters."

And better friends. And that's what he missed. They had an understanding, there. A mutual respect and skill. And it had been... nice. But now those memories were tainted with those of passion. And of hurt. Her hurt, specifically.

She nodded. Before his death penalty, everything had been perfect between them. They had been hunting partners and they had been friends. She hadn't found anyone here with whom she felt so at ease in hunting with. It was almost a little like hunting with Gale again -- before matters had grown complicated between them as well.

It wasn't fair. Wasn't fair at all.

"We did." She glanced in the direction of Foo Foo and her lips twitched into a slight grin. "Better when you didn't bring him along."

Sokka gave a slight smile at the cub. He was being noisy just rolling around in the grass, oblivious to the fact there was now no longer a single animal within sight.

"He doesn't really have the knack for it."

She hated to think how much the animal had gotten to her. Foo Foo had become a rarity. An animal Katniss actually wouldn't think of killing. While it was not a sentiment she'd ever admit aloud, it had become clear in her actions. Feeding him squirrels. Grinning just a little.

"...I could try teaching him."

Well, it wasn't quite hunting together. But it was a first step.

"That's... not a bad idea. It would be better than Aang trying to teach him to get in touch with nature while I'm not in the village."

He regretted tricking Aang into taking care of Foo Foo. Aang trying to teach Foo Foo to be a vegetarian was completely against Sokka trying to teach Foo Foo to be a vicious beast.

She nodded. Stupid animal, getting under her skin. She shouldn't be doing anything for Sokka. Not after, well. After everything that happened between them. But it was for Foo Foo, she reminded herself. Because Sokka might not always be here. Someone needed to look out for him, make certain that he could survive in the wild.

"Okay."

Awkwardly, she steps from one foot to another. And then she looked over at Foo Foo. "What do you think? Want to go hunting with me?"

Foo Foo looked up at her and had the typical look of a dumb animal thrilled to have any kind of attention. He might have even understood her. Maybe not. But he seemed thrilled at the idea of it.

And then he tried hopping up on her, which was always a wonderful idea with large animals.

"I think that's a yes."

She probably should have known better. But for some reason, she had been stupid enough to think that Sokka had trained the beast well enough not to jump on others anymore. He was getting too big, too heavy. And it took all of her strength to stay rooted to the spot as she pushed Foo Foo back down.

"Stupid animal," she muttered, directing her scowl more so at Sokka than at Foo Foo.

Sokka came up behind Foo Foo and made sure he stayed down, kneeling beside him to wrap an arm around him.

"Bad Foofy. We don't jump on people. Especially people who will eventually look very tiny compared next to you." The moose-lion appeared disappointed by this and very guilty. It was very heartwarming. Fortunately Sokka wouldn't fall for it.

He looked up at Katniss. "Sorry, like I said... he's a work in progress."

Sokka earned another scowl at that. Even if she knew that Foo Foo would grow big, that she wasn't necessarily all that small in comparison to other girls her age, the wording still bothered her. Made her feel diminutive. Not something she wanted to feel in front of Sokka.

"I've noticed."

He had meant everyone will look tiny compared to Foo Foo. Including himself. And unfortunately he had not realized Katniss took it personally. Regardless, he gave the beast a pat on the side before standing up.

"Anyway, if you're still interested in taking him hunting... well, he's not hard to find. Or I could just drop him off at your place."

The answer is relatively simple. One option involves seeing Sokka every day. She can't do that. She's not ready. He's still too much of a reminder. Of everything she had done wrong. She shouldn't have let Sokka get to her in that way. She should have kept faithful to Peeta's memory. She didn't deserve that kind of happiness.

"I'll pick him up." When Sokka wasn't home. "Will he come with me?"

Sokka looked down to Foo Foo for a moment before nodding.

"He trusts you."

He understood why she asked and he couldn't be upset. Well, no more than a little. This was awkward enough. A daily conversation like this would be a bit much.

Katniss follows his gaze down to Foo Foo. The moose lion looks absolutely innocent, nothing at all like the ferocious predator Sokka claims he'll some day be. Well, her father had taught her well. And she and Gale had taught each other. Maybe something could be done for Foo Foo, too.

Not handing him treats all the time would be a good start.

"Okay." A pause. She can't help but wonder, for a moment, if this means Sokka trusts her, too. She doesn't know why he would. Not when her affections seem so easily brought. "I'll pick him up then. A few times a week?"

Sokka nodded.

"It's a deal. He sleeps outside with Appa and he's not hard to find."

It's impossible to miss Appa. She's seen him from time to time, to and from the forest. He's still one of the biggest creatures she's ever seen. One she still feels as if she needs to be wary of, even if she knows he's tame. Friendly, even.

Maybe too friendly.]

Deal.

"Great. Then... I guess we'll move on." He started to walk away. "Foo Foo, c'mon."

The cub gave Katniss one last happy look before trotting after Sokka.

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