stillplaying | 15th Game [action/video]

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15th Game [action/video]

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[She awoke that morning to find them gone. Those beautiful, amazing iridescent wings were gone. And in their place, the damn mockingjay wings had returned. Small, useless. Reminders of a life she would have happily left behind. She fit easily on the couch again, her bed of the last two months. But at the cost of her flight. At the cost of being grounded once more.

If it was not for the overwhelming guilt she felt shortly after - guilt for cancelling her sister's party under paranoia of too many people in their living quarters - she probably would have spent the day sulking. And it was tempting, so tempting to just disappear into the woods all day. But she couldn't afford that luxury. Not anymore. If her wings were gone, that meant that there was a good chance the spirit possession had ended. Life had returned to what passed for normal around here.

And she had a party to plan.

But first, she had a sister to seek out. And surprise with breakfast in bed: pancakes and maple syrup, with a mug of hot chocolate and glass of orange juice.

Later that day, Katniss could be found going about her regular daily schedule. Spending time hunting in the woods, guitar lessons at Cloud Nine, browsing the various shops. The recent event reminded her that Prim was relatively undefended here, a situation that needed to be corrected. Even a small knife, anything to give her sister the advantage if Katniss wasn't around to protect her. Food for the party was also a necessity. As well as any remaining decorations.

It wasn't until later that night that she finally opened up her journal. But rather than being at home, she's made herself comfortable in one of the newfeather watch towers, where she had been stashing most of the party supplies prior to the possessions. She opened the journal and made certain to key in a quick filter before recording:]

[Video - filtered away from Primrose Everdeen]

I wasn't exactly myself when I cancelled Prim's birthday last week. But I want to make it up to her. She deserves this party. More than anyone I know. She's fourteen now and... [She had to pause for a moment, force a smile on her face and block all memories of her sister burning to death from her mind.] She's never had a real party before.

So, this Saturday. At House 43. 5 P.M. You don't have to bring any kind of gift. It's not necessary. It's enough to have people there. To have the sort of celebration she never had back in District 12. If you know me, or you know Prim, I'd like you to come.

[She realized that she was taking a big risk saying that. And it did make her uncomfortable, the thought of so many people in her living space. But a party was supposed to have people in it, isn't it? A lot of people. And the more there, the more that want to celebrate the life Prim should have had, the better. Prim deserved the world.]

Rapunzel? Would you still be willing to make that cake? Teddy, will you still help with music? [Katniss paused, tilting her head thoughtfully and biting her lip. Was there anything else that she was missing? What else was necessary for planning a party? She already felt as if she owed so many people so much. She hated accumulating more debt. But for Prim, it was worth it/] And Aang, would you mind helping to decor-

I need someone to distract Prim that day, too.

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Even if that stint had only lasted for a week or so, it had seemed like forever since she had last done this with him. And she had, in the past few months, grown to really enjoy the kisses. And more.

When he pulled away to mention the party decorations, she gave him a sheepish smile. "I'm just storing them here. Aang's going to help me bring them to the house on Saturday."

Whether the boy knew it or not.

"Lucky him." The mention of Aang managed to surprise him, though. Sure, it was a small town, but he hadn't had any experience of Katniss interacting with his own housemates. It was concerning.

"I didn't know you two were friends."

She had, for some reason or another, always just thought Sokka knew that Aang had befriended her. She never attempted to hide either friendship from the other. And Aang knew, didn't he, that she was friends with Sokka?

"Yeah." Katniss responded with a shrug, still looking thoughtful. And not really seeing what the big deal was. "We met months ago. In the restaurant, I think."

"Huh." Sokka mulled on that a bit. For now, it wasn't important. Just something to keep in mind.

"So, if it's not for party stuff, I'm assuming I'm here for other things, right?"

He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Other things. That could mean a lot, couldn't it? Sex and talk and anything not related to Prim and her party. A break from a day's worth of planning that she sorely needed. She wanted to skip straight to the other things his eyebrow waggle implied.

"Mm-hmm."

But, she found as she went to steal another kiss, she couldn't get her mind off of other things. That he had died. It kind of made kissing him harder than she had anticipated.

Well, booty call it was. Sokka could live with that.

"That's a yes, then."

He eagerly returned her kiss, already moving his hands to start undressing her. After so long doing nothing together, he was more than eager to make good on the invitation.

She already found herself responding to his touch, leaning in to his hands and wanting more. But her mind was still elsewhere. Not on the potential of sex, of making her body feel so very good. Forgetting for a while that she was alone here when it came to having a romantic partner.

But for all she wanted this, Sokka was her friend. Someone she cared for. And, surprisingly, wanted to protect.

She broke away from the kiss suddenly and placed her hands on top of his. It took a few deep breaths for her to slow her racing heartbeat, to resist the urge to kiss him again.

"You died. It's in the journal. Someone announced that you died three months ago," she said quietly before pausing. And shrugging a little awkwardly. It wasn't her business. But she would have wanted someone to tell her if her personal life was shared without permission. "I thought you should know. In case you didn't already."

Edited 2013-06-07 03:48 (UTC)

When she stopped, he wanted to ask her what's wrong. Before he could, he already had his answer. It was one he didn't want to hear. It was soothed by the lack of accusation or confrontation. After getting chided by Winry, Sheena, Edward, Suki, and others, he was having his fill of people berating him. It was a comfort that this wasn't another incident like that.

"I know. Shikamaru is an ass." Sokka pulled away with a frustrated huff. "I don't know how he found out. I didn't want anyone to know."

She readjusted her clothing when he pulled away, not quite re-buttoning the shirt all the way but enough so that she'd be decent. For a moment, she took a step forward to comfort him. And then she hesitated, frozen in the spot. Prim had been the only person she was ever even remotely good at comforting. And even then, she doubted that she was all that effective at times.

Wrapping her arms around her body, she nodded. Though she had been open about her death - to a degree - it was mostly to help cover the truth. That she had used Clove to commit suicide. It was better everyone thought that she had been killed by a pack of wild dogs instead.

"Do you want to talk about it at all?"

In truth, Sokka felt nothing about his own death. No sadness, no fear. It happened and he reasonably knew it had bad, but managed to work out well for him in the end. Still, he saw that she was concerned, so he put an arm around her, instead guiding them to sit on the bed.

"It was a mission. We were on one of the space ships, like back on the Moon Base draft? There wasn't an attack, but. There was a malfunction."

She looked up at him in surprise when he wrapped his arm around her. To be honest, she hadn't expected him to open up so easily. It had taken those damn chocolates for her to be honest about the suicide with anyone but Clove. And even that had taken some time.

But it was easy to lean in to his embrace and let him lead her over to the bed. As he talked, she placed her hand on his thigh in reassurance.

"And you got caught in it." It was as simple as that. You could do everything in your power to survive and in the end, something so utterly stupid could claim your life. The odds were never really in one's favor, were they? "...do you know what you lost?"

Sokka had an idea of what he'd lost. But how does one explain to a lover that he's lost his entire ability to feel empathy for anyone, especially when it's possibly the only reason they were together?

You don't. So he settled for something else. It was close to the truth, at least.

"I think I lost the part of me that feels sad. Guilt, sadness, worry... stuff like that. They're just not there anymore. And after everything in Luceti, it's been nice not having that. It feels right."

And she had lost her song. What she would have given to be able to lose those sorts of emotions. Especially when they had driven her to take her own life. Grief for losing Peeta, for losing the potential of having a real life with him. One that wasn't affected by the hijacking. Guilt that he'd have to live through everything still. Would be tortured because of her. Guilt, too, that she faced every time she saw Clove or Cato. And even, sometimes, Prim.

It wasn't fair, in her opinion. Not even in the slightest. Why couldn't she have lost something like that? Why did it have to be something that meant so much to her?

"You're lucky," she said quietly, resting her head against his shoulder. Her thumb stroked his leg gently. "Sometimes, I think I'd give anything for that. Not to have to feel."

Not to wake up screaming every night. Not to be affected by those nightmares that still wouldn't let her be.

He rested his cheek along the top of her head and moved his hand up to her shoulder. Even though he felt nothing, there was a part of him that tried to mimic old behaviors out of a desire, a need, to want to feel those things again. But he never did. He just went through the motions anyway.

"I can't say it's been bad. I'm glad for it. But if my friends found out about it, I don't think they'd understand like you do. They'd want to 'fix' me."

"It's not my business," she answered, the silent promise within her statement. she wouldn't say a word to any of them. Not of her own violation. Sokka's death penalty was his to deal with. His to decide to reverse or keep. She wasn't going to make that decision for him. Nor would she give his friends any reason to pressure him.

Because, if situations were reversed? She'd want to keep that, too. Even if, lately, she was happier than she had been for a long time, Katniss knew it wouldn't last. Nothing ever did. Sooner or later, Prim would disappear. Richard would grow tired of their living arrangement. Sokka would decide he was tired with whatever this arrangement was between them. Someone else she cared about would find someway, however inadvertently, hurt her. Or, worse, she'd hurt them.

That was just the way her life was. Odds never in her favor for long.

"I won't mention it to any of them if you don't want me to."

Sokka smiled and planted a kiss on the top of her forehead. He didn't know what was going on inside her head and even if he did, he wouldn't care. But it was refreshing to know that, finally, someone was in his corner. With so many people turning against him, he needed someone he could count on.

"Thanks, Katniss. Sometimes I think you're the only one around here I can rely on."

She smiled at the kiss and tilted her head up to return it with a kiss on his lips. It wasn't that much of a big deal to her. Something she would have done for any of her friends. Even, maybe, for someone she didn't know. Because she had had so much of her private life stripped away from her in the Hunger Games and in the uprising. She could understand the need to cling to what you had.

"That's what friends do, right?"

Edited 2013-06-08 03:27 (UTC)

He turned himself around a bit, mid-kiss, just to be in a better position. With that quibble seemingly settled, he was ready to pick up where they left off.

"Mm-hmm. Really good friends get to do other things."

It would be very, very easy to crawl into his lap right now. Crawl into his lap and push him down on to the bed and take every inch of control of the situation. A part of her wanted to. Interrupting their earlier kiss for serious talk hadn't entirely ruined the mood it seemed. But that would be too easy. And not nearly as fun as making him work for it.

So she stayed put in her seat on the bed and only raised an eyebrow instead. "I thought you weren't interested in helping with the decorations."

Sokka had expected passionate love making and so her question brought him up short. He blinked at her, feeling like he had no idea what just happened.

"Decorations...?"

It took a great deal of her willpower not to start laughing. Because that befuddled look on his face was exactly what she was hoping for. She blinked her eyes at him, pretending to be confused by his confusion. Playing innocent.

Or, at least, as innocent as she possibly could.

"Did you mean something else?"

"... well, yeah? This is our place."

He could elaborate, but he didn't see a reason why he needed to. This was where they made with the loving. Not the decorating.

She knew what he meant. This was their place. The most private place either of them could think of. No one had reason to come here when it wasn't time for the arrival of newcomers. There were no roommates or siblings to interrupt. It gave them a chance to do as they pleased without fear of interruption.

For her to act like she was now, coy and flirtatious and not at all the least bit shamed about it.

She smiled at him and shrugged. "I think I might need a reminder."

"I think I can manage that."

He leaned over and planted a kiss, before pushing her back on top of the bed so he could be on top of her, planting tiny kisses on her lips, cheek, and anywhere else he could manage.

A shiver ran down her spine as he pushed her down on the bed and moved to cover her body with is. There was absolutely no doubt where this would lead. Nor any doubt that she wanted this, missed it so very much over the past week. The effectiveness of his reminder, of lips against her skin, already had her squirming a little in delight.

"Good," she murmured as she began to unwrap his tunic, voice a happy purr, "reminder."

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15th Game [action/video]

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